toxic waste nuclear sludge not safe to eat
January 31, 2011 Tags: bear balls, candy bars, candy dynamics, nuclear waste, shitto, spotted dick, toxic waste nuclear sludge
Category: on air 21 Comments 
today on air with kenny jones – we discovered that it’s no longer safe to eat toxic waste nuclear sludge…duh! this is actually not your run of the mill toxic sludge we’re talking about.
a candy made in pakistan called called “toxic waste nuclear sludge” has been recalled as not safe to eat. I would think that would be evident from the name alone — the u.s. government says candy imported from pakistan called toxic waste nuclear sludge is not safe to eat.
the food and drug administration announced that the u.s. distributor of nuclear sludge chew bars is recalling the candy because of lead contamination. although no one has been sickened for the chew bars yet, the fda said elevated lead content could be harmful to small children, infants and pregnant women.
indianapolis-based candy dynamics said it would stop selling all nuclear sludge in the u.s. – it sounds awkward just sayin’ that! anyway, if you see anything that looks like this:
or this:
*****DON’T EAT IT!*****
the company’s website features the screech of a blaring warning horn, buzzers & whistles and is a must see. CLICK HERE to have a look.
i think the name of the product is just an indicator it shouldn’t be put in one’s mouth. this got us thinking about other products with names that are a bit of a deterrent. have a look at some others we’ve stumbled across:
pee cola
this flavorful beverage with the … uh, unique … name is made and bottled in the african nation of ghana. do not under any circumstances look at the ingredients!
shitto pepper sauce
this is another one made and packaged in ghana. it’s a hot pepper sauce for cooking. who wouldn’t try it with a name like that?
crap
doesn’t make me wanna run out and grab a bar. just keep tellin’ yourself – it’s not dooty – it’s just a candy bar…or is it!
fart bar
that is the actual name of this candy bar and i don’t know about you – but i don’t want to know what it tastes like.
fart juice
after you eat your fart bar you can wash it down with this lovely beverage. i’m guessing that the marketing team was looking for new jobs after launching with this product name…at least i hope they were.
wanker
i quite like the name of this beverage. and i can think of a few people i’d like to present one of these delicious bevies to.
spotted dick
apparently this is a british treat or somethin’ – but with a name like that, would you want to put it in your mouth?
cock soup
while we’re on the subject – this product’s name might make you wonder where it gets its flavor from.
6 faggots in gravy
i know it’s not the most politically correct product name but these meatball-like things are a hit in britain – alright, maybe they’re not a “hit”, but that’s where they’re made and sold.
mini-dickmann’s
there’s also a super-dickmann’s. what are these things? chocolate covered somthin’ or others i guess…they’re candies from germany.
pet sweat
supposedly it’s just bottled water from japan. but the name certainly doesn’t make you want to drink it – am i wrong?
bear balls
at least they’re not “bare balls“, right? there made in the good ole united states…but still, don’t eat this!
and the award for the worst product slogan of all time goes to…
gaytime
i’m simply at a loss for words…
if you have any other strange food names you’d like to add to our list please post. i’m sure we’re just scratching the surface with ours.
wake up on air with kenny jones – weekdays from 7-11am exclusively on radio indigo 91.9.
love your stuff kenny jones! thanks for putting off a great show.
I must say this was an excellent read. you’re awsome Kenny Jones! simply AWESOME!
i’m hungry for some toxic sludge! where can i get mine???
what’s wrong with a lil’ bit of lead once in a while?
great stuff kenny jones!
It’s always nice to check out your blog, you always keep me laughing and entertained! thanks kenny jones – LOVE YOU!
I want to voice my admiration for your amazing show. Thanks a ton for keep us entertained every morning Kenny Jones. this is from each and everyone of us here in Bangalore.
Sounds delicious!!! You should take part in a contest for one of the best blogs on the web. I will recommend this site!
love your show kenny jones – KEEP IT UP!
love you
xx
Thanks for that awesome posting. It saved MUCH time
Does anyone know where you can get this stuff? haven’t had my daily does of LEAD!!!!
mmmmmmmm toxic sludge. nice post kenny jones!
Wonderful, post and even more wonerful show – listen to you EVERY mornings kenny jones. I’ll make sure to retweet your posts too!
yummy! i totally want one now!
I love your blog Kenny Jones & you rock Banglaore! don’t you EVER leave. you make my morning.
mmmmmmmmm. i think i’m gonna puke!
unreal! thanks for the great post kenny jones
Wonderful! This was a very good quality publish. Always love your stuff…even when it’s as gross as toxic candy
thanks for making our days!!!! Kenny Jones ROCKS!!!!
hey brother!!!! you’re my hero. love the posts.
thanks again kenny jones. you’ve once again made my day
great post kenny jones. you’re the best. always love your stuff. great show too.
I am very grateful to have found your blog kenny jones. it always makes me laugh. and in this case…gag! LOL. love it and love your show too. thanx
think i’m gonna puke
thanks kenny jones
i’d try it! great post kenny jones! keep rockin the air waves!